Fortunately, I've never bought into the idea that I can make an amend for past behavior by simply improving the way I conduct myself today. Not only would I be cheating someone out of an apology, I'd be cheating myself out of the opportunity to practice humility.Treating people with respect and love is their right, it is how we are supposed to treat them. Behaving decently does not in any way repair the damage we have caused and does not fall into the realm of making amends. Step Nine says "made direct amends", it doesn't say, "made indirect amends". It also indicates that "it requires an admission and correction of errors".
When it comes to the wreckage of my past (or present), the only way I can make amends is by admitting where I've been wrong. In Step Nine, "acting as if" won't cut it.
