Fortunately, I've never bought into the idea that I can make an amend for past behavior by simply improving the way I conduct myself today. Not only would I be cheating someone out of an apology, I'd be cheating myself out of the opportunity to practice humility.Treating people with respect and love is their right, it is how we are supposed to treat them. Behaving decently does not in any way repair the damage we have caused and does not fall into the realm of making amends. Step Nine says "made direct amends", it doesn't say, "made indirect amends". It also indicates that "it requires an admission and correction of errors".
When it comes to the wreckage of my past (or present), the only way I can make amends is by admitting where I've been wrong. In Step Nine, "acting as if" won't cut it.
1 comment:
It's good to say you're sorry and have the words spoken. But, for me and my uncle, he had said he was sorry. I really let go of the past when he had been drinking and sometimes hurt us when I really knew he wasn't drinking any more. When he came to family dinners and Mom and I were shopping and bought sparkling grape juice cause Uncle Wayne isn't drinking any more. Even though we still had wine and spirits at our dinners he kept to the sparkling juice. I was so proud to have bought that for him (I was just a kid then) and I was even prouder and happy when he drank it and said thank you to me for getting it.
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